Knock walls down....

We all have a dream inside of us that we wish the world would be like. This dream is most likely not what life is like when we watch TV, walk through our neighborhoods, or fly across the world. We see people who are obsessed with greed and power. This reality often saddens many people and breaks us down and allows the cycles to continue the way they are. I believe the majority of people want to have respect and kindness for one another, but they have built walls that cover up that care and concern for one another. This is understandable because of the hurt from either family, a friend, a lover, the government, the police, or the people who are in charge who are suppose to make this world a safer place for us. Therefore, we hide because we are afraid to be vulnerable and to show the beauty we feel deep, deep inside. We stay in fear, because we dont want to be hurt again. However, our hiding just allows these hurts to grow and grow, which creates a great depression, which is where our world is today. We are in a depression in many ways. Besides the economy, the people are depressed emotionally. I think we need to break down these walls that we put up because of the betrayal of others. Keeping these walls up and feeling down and depressed, we are only allowing those that hurt us to continue to have that control over our feelings. We need to take back our control of our own happiness and show each other the respect and the kindness we each deserve just because we are all human. Sure, when we begin to be who we truely are deep, deep inside, this loving caring, fun person, we will get hurt by someone. That will happen. But, you need to remember that you are better than to live in pain and to live in anger because of what another person does. If you choose to live in that pain and with that hurtful anger or saddness you are allowing this person to hurt you again and again. You are allowing them to control you. We should never let another person have that much power over our lives, over how we feel because inside we are all beautiful and we all have so much to offer each other. I believe if we begin expressing our kindness and our niceness to others, this world would become a better place, closer to our dreams of what it would be like.

Old Year Review and New Year Renewal

Happy New Year! This is one of my favorite days of the year. To me, like many others, I make it about a time of reviewing my life for the past year and renewing myself. I evaluate where I was, what I liked, what I accomplished, what I did not, how I changed and so on. This last year was amazing in so many ways. I was accomplishing my goals, I was on a path where I was happy and wanted to be. I had success with my clients, with my girls, I was in the shape that I wanted to be, I was eating mostly organics and working out at least 5 days a week, I was able to go away to Myrtle Beach for two months for vacation, I was in a small band, I was almost finished writing my novel. I was happy and I had lots going on that was positive.Then, I was sexually assaulted by a cop and it took it all away. My world crashed. That was only 4 months ago. I am for the first time in my life unable to meet all my bills, because I was not able to focus on my clients, therefore could not work for a few months, the band is gone, I stopped writing my novel. I dont have the freedom, I did before. So much has happened and change at the end of the last year. So that was my review. Now, to my renewal. Even though that happened to me crumbled my world for a few months, it made me see my goals more clearly. It made me realize that I was not on the path that I really want to be on. I always wanted to help people who were sexually abused and to show people that they can be happy inside despite whatever they are going through. This situation that tore apart my world is putting me back on that path. So, I was broken for a while and honestly, still struggle with what happened. But, this New Year I will be renewed and stronger. I will continue to enhance this website. I am doing my best to do what I can for others. I have a newsletter coming out for my town, beginning on January 14th, that promotes kindness and community, as well as offers some fun stuff too. I will be starting a new website for sexual abuse awareness, as well as start talking with others about this matter. I will be out there helping others because I know how hard certain situations are and I never had the help to get through them. I want to give them something I never had. I want to do what I think needs to be done.